Finding myself renewed

I am...
   a conqueror, fearless, more, the answer, chosen, changed, a leader, a teacher, a mom, destined, decided, a daughter, a sister, whuth speaker, a wife, a truth seeker, alive, radiant, loved, brave, real, motivated, a champion, a fighter, disciplined, resilient, a believer....

There are not enough words in Webster to describe what my eyes and ears experienced this weekend, but I MUST share just a piece or two that started a rumbling inside of me that simply won't be settled.

Just a few of my favorite people that I had some face time with  this weekend.

Flashing back to the August AdvoCare Success School in Texas, I purchased my ticket to attend the AdvoCare Ladies Alive 2013 event here in Nashville as scheduled this weekend. I knew that I would need a renewal of inspiration about this time of year given all the pressures of work, family, finances, planning holiday celebrations, etc. so I didn't even hesitate to pay the $29. AdvoCare never seems to do anything half way so I was sure the money would be well spent. However, as Friday rolled around, I found myself wishing that I had not signed up to go. The voices in my head kept repeating, "It would only be $29 wasted and I could spend those 8 hours with my family. After all, I rarely get a whole weekend free to enjoy them so that's what I need to do." But...I knew that my friends were counting on me to be there, and I was not about letting them down. The truth is that those friendships that I have developed and rekindled in the last 9-10 months mean the world to me, and I wouldn't want to lose what I had gained all because I was being a bit lazy and feeling withdrawn. I mean seriously...I recognized that about myself back in August when I initially purchased the ticket. I need inspiration poured into me routinely, and AdvoCare events tend to do just that. SO....I put on my big girl panties and made my way to the front doors of Two Rivers Baptist Church just in time to see hundreds...I mean hundreds...of women filing in to register and get their goodie bags filled with great gifts such as a bracelets with "Powerful" and "Empowered" stamped boldly on them. As I was snapping this picture of my keepsakes this morning, I realized that I had one of my other inspirational pieces stacked with them..."The journey is the reward." How very true that is!

1,200+ women with similar goals in life all gathered in one place to allow hope and inspiration to be poured into their hearts. Yep, that's exactly what my eyes experienced within the first 10 minutes of my arrival.

Friday night was filled with story after story of success with weight loss, overcoming financial struggle, and the affects of believing in yourself.

I learned that I must possess 4 weapons for battle in this life.
1. DISGUST (with my current situation)
2. DESIRE (for a better life and for change)
3. Be TEACHABLE
4. Possess the WILLINGNESS TO WORK

The honest truth is that I am disgusted with the time that I must spend away from my kids and the man that I love on the weekends. I have realized that my weight loss efforts are truly part of a journey. I have the desire for relief of these circumstances and need for change. I feel that I am teachable. I am definitely not afraid to work.
However, there must be a 5th weapon that is the very key to being a difference maker. That 5th attribute is definitely....DON'T FEAR STEPPING OUT OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE.

Now those that know me would probably agree that I am pretty outgoing and not afraid of change. I will not hesitate to start something new and encourage others to jump in feet first with me. My fear lies with acceptance. I want the likability meter to be pushing toward the top when folks think of me. I have tried to adopt the attitude of "who cares" but I just can't seem to completely take ownership of that idea. My sweet husband tells me that I fret too much about making everyone around me happy. But...maybe that's what makes me who I am. I think most people have a desire (some deeper than others) to be accepted and needed. Now all that being said, I have had some real personal growth over this last year that has allowed me to appreciate what I am today rather than mourning over what I am not.

On a side note...
At this very moment, I am sitting up in the bed typing these words while my hubby is laying next to me listening to his music through his headphones. I have to giggle as I overhear "Better Class of Losers" playing. Brilliant words spoken by that 'ole Randy Travis. Ok, ok...I know you think...this chick is crazy. And...you may be correct :). Now, back on task to sharing...

As the conference reconvened on Saturday morning, I can't describe the feelings that were stirred in my gut as I heard women sharing from their heart about the challenges that they face in this life. Being the CEO of your own company is not without challenges, fear, and frustrations. Along with their honesty and transparency, they were quick to share that we must be careful not to compare our backstage with the highlight reels that were being shared from that very stage, on the Facebook pages of our friends, and in casual conversations in our daily life. Struggles are abundant in everyone's life. The real challenge is being transparent about those struggles but not letting them hold you back from building a better life for yourself and breathing life into those around you.

If I am completely honest with myself, the fear of being "that girl" that walks around talking about vitamins or chatting it up about the importance of healthy lifestyle is what keeps me locked in that boxed comfort zone. I would rather people come to me for those answers rather than me offering them an opportunity like what I have my hands on. Crazy, huh...I know. But...that all goes back to the fear of people not liking me. The truth is that we should all be into taking better care of ourselves with better nutrition, intentional exercise, and adding the best supplements on the market into our life to fill those nutritional gaps. After all, we are only given one vessel to carry us through the storms of life.

All this talk makes me reflect on a conversation that I had with my teenage girls not long ago. One of them asked me if I was popular in school. I replied, "Well, no, not really. I just had a group of friends that I hung out with that accepted my average." The truth is...AVERAGE is sufficient...but finding my AWESOME would be stinkin' amazing. That leads me to one of my favorite lines shared from stage yesterday. "You will become most like the 5 people that you share the most time with." Guess what?! How very true that is. Just know that I am bent on surrounding myself with positive, motivated people that hold me accountable and challenge me to find my awesome. Thinking outside of that comfort zone is right up there with exercising and eating right everyday for me because it's the only thing that will make a difference in my tomorrow.

I am renewed and have a "decided heart" to be a difference maker. I will seize each day and accept responsibility for my future. (Thanks to Brooks Reid)
My "minds eye" tells me to step out of the comfort zone and not limit myself to only what my eyes see but to allow myself to dream again. Allowing myself to do things that are uncomfortable is my new challenge.

This Daily Affirmation  is a quick clip that everyone must experience. Just click and watch.
We all need to take some pointers from this precious blonde-haired beauty.

Final words...
I am working to believe in myself and all that I am meant to be.
I refuse to be trapped by small minded thoughts of my own and of others.

A quote that a dear friend shared with me during my struggles last week.

I am ALIVE and POWERFUL!